Title: MASTER PENGUIN Author: Sabrina Fandom: Anitaverse Rating: F for Fun Disclaimer: Anita, Sigmund and the stuffed penguins are property of LKH. I'm just borrowing them. Summary: There’s a new master in Anita’s bedroom. Status: Complete Date: 11 January 2004 Feedback: sabriks@hotmail.com
Late night. Nobody home at Anita’s. She is out, working in a complicated case, raising a stinking corpse, slaying a master vampire, trying to hide her crush on Richard unsuccessfully, saving JC from real death, teaching freckled Larry, peeking at sexy vampires in tiny leather clothes, having a big fight with the local police and taking a delightful look at a murder scene before the ripped corpse is buried. Yeah, she’s really tough and busy. Back to Anita’s. Her bedroom. Total darkness, except for a corner near the bed, where all her stuffed penguins are settled in three wooden shelves. In front of them, on the floor, you can see a penguin standing, holding a candle in one hand...hmm...wing. It’s Sigmund! In the shelves, the penguins are agitated, arguing out loud to each other, gesticulating. Suddenly, from the floor, Sigmund shouts: "SILENCE!!!" All the penguins stop talking immediately. Then, Sigmund continues: "Thank you. Ladies and gentlemen! We're here tonight to discuss our situation in this room. As everybody knows, I'm Anita's favorite sweet penguin. Annnnd, according to our voting (they start talking out loud again in the shelves)...SILENCE PLEASE!!" The penguins shut their mouths up and Sigmund can speak: "Thank you. Sooooo, according to our voting, I'm your new...(dramatic pause: Sigmund opens a wide smile)...MASTER PENGUIN!" Silence. "As your Master Penguin, I'm going to protect you, and you're going to be loyal to me", Sigmund continues. "You'll be MY people and I'll be your beloved Master. So, I invite all the male penguins to meet me tomorrow night at 3 a.m....in the bathroom, uh...inside the tub." The penguins get really nervous now, furious. " Annnnd....I'm certainly going to explain to you my plans to our community's nightlife, uh....later...For now, that's it. Thank you very much!" And Sigmund is quickly reached and greeted by a small group of supportive male penguins, while the other penguins start arguing out loud again. In the highest shelf, two old female penguins are talking politely. "I've heard Sigmund has been sleeping with Jean-Claude in his coffin during the day. Anita offered him because she thought it would be nice if Jean-Claude had some company...", the one with glasses says. "Oh, yeahhh, I seeee....Annnd don't you thing Jean-Claude looks like a giant penguin, a werepenguin from naughty dreams?", the old penguin in a weird wig asks, with a wicked smile in her face. "Oh, yeah, all that black and white wear style...hmm, really charming...", the other nods. "Except he DOES have teeth and DOES really fly", the wigged one says jealously. "Oh, shut up, you old BIRD!", the myopic one replies. "Don't call me that, you EGGLESS one!", the old bird exclaims, much more outraged. "I can still have eggs!!", the myopic eggless one replies. "Oh, no, you can't! You steal them!!!", the wigged bird shouts, throwing a wing at the myopic one’s face. The two old female penguins slap each other, feathers flying in the air. Unfortunately, before the others come to help, the old ladies fall from the shelf and break their necks. Dead stuffed meat.
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